Stem Cell

The Best Reason Yet to Support Stem Cell Research by Hans Phingers

ARTIST’S COMMENTS: Can any of us honestly say we haven’t dreamed of having tiny hands on the ends of our fingers and thumbs? Well, evolution may have fallen asleep at the wheel, but stem cell research could very well make finger-hands a possibility! Or at least that’s what my total lack of familiarity with virtually all scientific disciplines has led me to believe. But never mind that - let’s, for now, just think about the incredible advantage finger-hands would give us. Now, my numbers may be a bit off here, but I think it’s reasonable to assume that with finger-hands we would all be able to type somewhere in the neighbourhood of 12,000 words per minute, and although almost no one would be able to afford manicures anymore, sign language would be the high speed communication tool of the future, we could all give massages to beat the band, and everyone in the world would be a piano player extraordinaire! Also, even a small group of people would be able to create tremendous levels of applause, thereby bringing huge amounts of joy to street performers everywhere. So, in conclusion, stem cell research will almost certainly lead us to a utopian civilization made possible by the incredible versatility of finger-hands.