Man & Woman

Women have their faults. Men have only two.
Everything they say. Everything they do.

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

A man is a person who will pay two dollars for a one-dollar item he wants.
A woman will pay one dollar for a two-dollar item that she doesn't want.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A woman will always cherish the memory of the man who wanted to marry her.
A man, of the woman who he didn't.

Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy:
One is to let her think she is having her own way,
and the other is to let her have it.

Married men live longer than single men.
But married men are a lot more willing to die.

Any married man should forget his mistakes;
no use in two people remembering the same thing.

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

If you women knew what we were thinking,
you'd never stop slapping us.

Women have two weapons - cosmetics and tears.

Women may be the only group that grows more radical with age.

God made man before woman to give him time to think of an answer for her first question.