Alcohol

One Sunday morning the minister was preaching about the dangers of alcohol.

To prove his point he held up 2 glasses, one had alcohol and the other had water.
He then put a live worm in each glass.

The worm in the alcohol shriveled up and died immediately.
The other one in the water glass was swimming around and very much alive.

The preacher asked the congregation what lesson do we learn from this demonstration.

The parish drunk replied: People who drink alcohol willnever have worms.

New Ball

Anil Kumble ki nai-nai shaadi hui. Suhaag raat ko Kumbleji ne apne room mein entry maari jaise maidan mein opponents ke chhakke chhudane nikalte hain.

Achanak Kumbleji serious ho gaye, wife se bole "Dekho hum zindagi bhar ab ek saath rehne wale hain. Koi lafda-locha ho to bata do."

Chokri smart thi. Usne ghoonghat uthaya aur aankhon mein aankhein daalkar boli "Ab ye to khud hi samajna chahiye."

Kumbleji confuse hokar bole "Kya samajhna chahiye?"

Ladki boli "Spinner ko kabhi new ball milta hai kya?!"

Movie by the name Gavaskar

Sunil Gavaskar hears about a movie called 'Gavaskar' newly released in Australia.

He feels quite flattered, he knew the Aussies always liked him, despite his run in with 'Dennis Lillee' and Gavaskar then gets himself invited for the premier, after sitting through the whole show he realizes that there wasn't a single mention of him or his great achievements in the movie.

He approached the producer visibly upset. "How come you make a movie called 'Gavaskar' and have no mention of me in it at all"?

The producer replies: "Dont make such a fuss ... you Indians made a movie called Border where there was no mention of Alan Border either."