IF Microsoft Made Cars

Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you'd have to buy a new car.

Occasionally your car would just die on the motorway for no reason, accept this, restart and drive on.

Occasionally, executing a maneuver would cause your car to stop and fail to restart and you'd have to re-install the engine. For some strange reason, you'd just accept this too.

You could only have one person in the car at a time, unless you bought a "Car 95" or a "Car NT." But then you'd have to buy more seats.

Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was twice as reliable, five times as fast, twice as easy to drive - but it would only run on five percent of the roads.

The Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft® upgrades to their cars which would make their cars go much slower.

The oil, engine, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.

People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft® cars, forgetting completely that they had been available in other cars for many years.

We'd all have to switch to Microsoft® gas and all auto fluids but thepackaging would be superb.

New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened.

They wouldn't build their own engines, but form a cartel with their engine suppliers. The latest engine would have 16 cylinders, multi-point fuel injection and 4 turbos, but it would be a side-valve design so you could use Model-T Ford parts on it.

There would be an "Engine Pro" with bigger turbos, but it would be sloweron most existing roads.

Microsoft® cars would have a special radio/cassette player which would onlybe able to listen to Microsoft® FM, and play Microsoft® Cassettes. Unless of course, you buy the upgrade to use existing stuff.